Cat Quotes

On the Negative

"They (cats) smell and they snarl and they scratch; they have a singular aptitude for shredding rugs, drapes and upholstery. They're sneaky, selfish, and not particularly smart; they are disloyal, condescending, and totally useless in any rodent free environment."
-- Jean-Micheal Chapereau

"If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?"
-- Steven Wright

"Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well."
-- Missy Dizick

"If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer."
-- Alfred North Whitehead

"The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact."
-- P.G. Wodehouse

"A man has to work so hard so that something of his personality stays alive. A tomcat has it so easy, he has only to spray and his presence is there for years on rainy days."
-- Albert Einstein

"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you."
-- Mary Bly

"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia."
-- Joseph Wood Crutch

"Kittens are born with their eyes shut. They open them in about six days, take a look around, then close them again for the better part of their lives."
-- Stephen Baker

"Everything I know I learned from my cat: When you're hungry, eat. When you're tired, nap in a sunbeam. When you go to the vet's, pee on your owner."
-- Gary Smith

On the Positive

"It is a very inconvenient habit of kittens that, whatever you say to them, they always purr."
-- Lewis Carroll

"To respect the cat is the beginning of the Aesthetic sense."
-- Erasmus Darwin

"The smallest feline is a masterpiece."
-- Leonardo Da Vinci

"Like a graceful vase, a cat, even when motionless, seems to flow."
-- George F. Will

"The idea of calm exists in a sitting cat."
-- Jules Renard

"If there were to be a universal sound depicting peace, I would surely vote for the purr."
-- Barbara L. Diamond

"A cat pours his body on the floor like water. It is restful just to see him."
-- William Lyon Phelps

"Who among us hasn't envied a cat's ability to ignore the cares of daily life and to relax completely?
-- Karen Brademeyer

If there is one spot of sun spilling onto the floor, a cat will find it and soak it up."
-- Jean Asper-McIntosh

"Subliminal kitty messages? "You are getting very sleepy" is not a command when said to a cat; it is an eternal truth."
-- Ari Ripkin

"A little drowsing cat is an image of perfect beatitude."
-- Jules Champfleury

"He seems the incarnation of everything soft and silky and velvety, without a sharp edge in his composition, a dreamer whose philosophy is sleep and let sleep."
-- Saki (H.H. Munro)

"Which is more beautiful: feline movement or feline stillness?"
-- Elizabeth Hamilton

"Cats are connoisseurs of comfort."
-- James Herriot

“The cat, it is well to remember, remains the friend of man because it pleases him to do so and not because he must.”
-- Carl Van Vechten

“A cat can maintain a position of curled up somnolence on your knee until you are nearly upright. To the last minute she hopes your conscience will get the better of you and you will settle down again.”
-- Pam Brown

“One small cat changes coming home to an empty house to coming home.”
-- Pam Brown

“Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.”
-- unknown

“People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life.”
-- Faith Resnick

“The cat has too much spirit to have no heart.”
-- Ernest Menaul

“God made the cat so that man might have the pleasure of caressing the tiger.”
-- Fernand Mery

“If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat.”
-- Mark Twain

“There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats.”
-- unknown

“Perhaps it is because cats do not live by human patterns, do not fit themselves into prescribed behavior, that they are so united to creative people.”
-- Andre Norton

“Dogs have Owners, Cats have Staff.”
-- unknown

“Your cat will never threaten your popularity by barking at three in the morning. He won't attack the mailman or eat the drapes, although he may climb the drapes to see how the room looks from the ceiling.”
-- Helen Powers

"There is indeed no single quality of the cat that man could not emulate to his advantage."
-- Carl Van Vechten